1. |
Coming Up For Air
03:30
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Coming Up For Air
September rolled by
October bristles on
I come up for air from under a blanket
Where are you?
I say out loud to no one, except you
You are in London, or
You are where you are
Where you'll stay
I poured out a wine
wondering as I drank it
Where are you?
I say out loud to no one, except you
It is me that’s all over the place
Me that could never decide
Not about you, oh no
You are in London, or
You are where you are
Where you'll stay no questions there
Only why, even think of you?
Even think of you
You, so good, you so sure
You, so unlikely to hurt anyone you love
Do you love me?
I wonder, if you ever even ask yourself?
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2. |
In Gratitude
05:20
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In Gratitude
Because it was the last gift you gave me
I hold it in my heart
Because it was the last thing
To pass between us, I keep it near
Because you are far away
I seek it out, everyday
To feel close to you
Because you’re kind, I bow my head
In gratitude
In gratitude
Because it was the last gift
Because you are older
Just a little older than me
I let myself, I let myself feel young
Because we are friends
I just smile
Because we are friends I say
I say nothing at all
I say, I say nothing at all
Because you’re kind
I bow my head, I bow my head
In gratitude
In gratitude
In gratitude
Thank you for the belief for the relief
For keeping me strong for so long
(Thank you for the belief for the relief)
In gratitude
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3. |
Eat
03:14
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Eat
So in the face of the loneliness
I find a lover
He is younger
He is handsome
He is a raw man
He smells good to me
So I eat, I eat
So in the face of the loneliness
In the face of the loneliness
In the face of the loneliness
In the face of the loneliness
I eat, I eat
Give me this, give me this
Give me this, give me this
Can you help me, help me heal
Can you touch me I want to feel
Can you know me in my bones
Can you take me back home?
He is a raw man, he is handsome
So I eat
He is a raw man
So in the face of the loneliness
I find a lover
He is younger
He is a raw man
(give me this, give me this)
He smells good to me
So I eat, yeah I eat
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4. |
June Bug
06:03
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June Bug
I am, you are, we are, here
I am tongue-tied, breath deep
Breathe, deep, I look down
I can’t hold your gaze too long
My friend I seek a truth I do not want
A disciple reaching out
for separate masters
June is so light
I sleep in the dark
Cover my eyes and let my hair fall
Let my hair fall
I dream of you, dream dream
I trace your lip on this photograph
I once took
You’re hard to find
You’re hard to keep
My hair slips through your fingers
My heart slips through your life
I stand on the sidelines
I like you
I watch you
It’s a pleasure walking near you
Bigger than me
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5. |
Body
03:58
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Body
Bring me your body, dearest
I want to know
Sleep with me
I will rise
In you
Ah, I love you
There is a moment
Before I see you
My heart
My heart beats
Beats, beats, beats
Beasts fall and howl
Broken bones
Bending, writhing, flailing
I am lost
In you, for you, to you
I am silence
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6. |
For Henry
04:26
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7. |
Prague
03:57
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Prague
Today I bought a phone for nineteen Euros
I had my phone stolen, in Paris
You see, when I was drunk
The fact stops me feeling outraged
Rather I feel like a fool
I will admit it is a relief
Knowing I can call you again, if I want
A small thing, as I rarely do this now
But I was calmed
As I punched in your number
As I punched in your number
Tomorrow I will be in Prague
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8. |
Corsica
06:01
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Corsica
Breathe into me
Come closer, much closer
How do you feel in my arms?
What is revealed in bridges and blue eyes
How do you feel when I smile
I see you once more
Certain you find my door and I
I feel you move I me now
But do you think that I should run
Am I too pale for the Corsican sun?
And do you think I should beware
Or do you think I should give up
The Corsican air
You hold me all night
Like I am your treasure
You hold me so tight
I can’t breathe, or leave
But this place where I’m right
Yields nothing in springtime
So let me be wrong but believe
That I see you and I
In visions of desire, and I feel
You move in me now
But if I could
I would be wild
Give the wheel to my inner child
Let her tear your world apart
‘Til she’s finished with your heart
‘Cause she thinks that I should run
‘Cause i’m too pale for the Corsican son
And she knows I’ll never share
Yeah she thinks I should give up
The Corsican heir
The Corsican heir
The Corsican heir
Breathe into me come closer, much closer
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9. |
Gun
05:26
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Gun
If I were to begin in the middle,
I might say
There’s a bridge you will cross
Which leads to the end of your life
But who ever knows the exact second
Into which they are born
Time, sinuate, slithering hours into days, days into years
Uncoils recklessly into all my wasted moments,
Engulfing the reach for certainty
The striving for something like truth
And I’ve spent my life trying to hear this song
Buried with, and wedded to desire
Shrouded by subjugation and rejection,
I now yield to the futility
Of trying to learn the song of my own heart
It’s strains woven with truth but as incoherent as bees
Spiralling down,
Infinite as the windings on a periwinkles back
Felt in the body
The little hairs rising up on my arms
And standing sentinel to all things is memory
Where we are at once imprisoned and liberated
It’s loss the drain into oblivion
I’m losing my own mother and I ask myself
Where have you gone Mam?
As I wish you into the gentle arms of gentle Jesus
All the while absconding from the crushing guilt I carry in my own
Surrendering to the velocity of life again and again
Reeling like Goldmund between lust and despair
Hungry for peace and cessation,
For the tranquil waters
But the waters are heaving with a leviathan
Essential rhythm giving way to automation
Hypnotised by machines
Hyper-muscular test tube dogs and weaponised super humans
Are created and absolved
No dead man’s switch, no dreams of electric sheep
The unceremonious knife-at-your-throat black-operative
Thought too explicit for our sanitised visions of death
And continents away
Many degrees separated from our acts,
We sit collectively, indifferently
Unaware that this dissociation
Is the last refuge of our dying soul
But in this small moment into which I am now born
Trying to see the world through the eyes of God’s avatar
I’m not proud, I seek only relief
From the cold burning my cheek,
The bright wind biting and drawing me inescapably towards myself
The salt stinging ice clad waves of November
Making hand holding impossible
And my heart grieves for that unusually sunny day spent indoors
And I realise
I’ve simply come back to where I began
But secretly, secretly
I’m still banging my drum
So keep from me, keep from me
A pill, a blade or a gun
Yeah secretly, secretly, yeah
I’m still banging my drum
You better keep from me, keep from me
A pill, a blade or a gun
A pill, a blade or a gun
Keep from me, keep from me, your gun
But Secretly, secretly,
I’m still banging my drum
You better keep from me, keep from me
A pill, a blade or a gun
Secretly, secretly
I’m still banging my drum
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10. |
There Are Words
03:11
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There Are Words
Where there are no fingers
There are words
Where there are no lips
There are words
Where my palms can’t sit full flat on your chest
Feeling your heartbeat, there are words
Where my hair cannot fall against your back
There are words
Where my foot can’t caress your calves
There are words
Where my breath cannot fall
Softly upon your neck
There are only words
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